Sunday, August 22, 2010

Parenting by Personality: Part V

If you and your child have very different personalities it can be frustrating. For the last five days, I have shared information from the June/July issue of Working Mother magazine, on Parenting by Personality. Today we will look at the "C Student vs. Academic Ace". Your child dreads report cards; you look forward to them.

What you need to know is that while striving fro academic excellence is important, straight A's are not essential to future success. What you need to assess, however, is whether you child is trying their best and still not getting A's or does your child's slacking off. If your child is really trying, their work ethic will benefit in the long run. Children who believe they do well on test because they work hard actually challenge themselves more than those who think they ace test because they're naturally smart, according to studies from Stanford University. What is important is to help your child find their passion and work toward that.

What to do:
1. Problem-solve with your child. I he/she's making valiant efforts and not understanding the material, ask them if they would like a tutor to help.

2. See if the teacher can offer extra help.

3. If you suspect your child isn't doing their homework, say something like, "What can we do to help you be more responsible about your homework? Let's come up with ideas together."

4. Support your child's love of learning, and avoid comparisons with other siblings or other children.

5. Provide a structure for success that includes a clearly designated time and place for homework.

6. Read with your child on topic of interest of the child. Even if the subject bores you, show interest in it, and let your child teach you what they know. This will keep your child wanting to keep learning.

7. Above all, remember that you child is a different student than your were, and don't pressure him/her to get the grades you did. Kids of high-achieving parents can struggle to feel a sense of their own accomplishment.

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